Football Sundays - Chili & Tight Ends - What's Not to Love?

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em - nothing is more true when you live with sports fanatics.  When our family gathers around the table for a meal, my husband and sons talk sports - or I should say - argue sports.

It's dizzying to me how much knowledge they possess about sports - any sport - ALL sports.  My husband sometimes has trouble remembering what I told him yesterday, but he can recall every New York Yankee lineup, past and present, AND remember each player's stats.  Our daughter and I would silently stare at each other during meals - rolling our eyes and shrugging our shoulders.  She was wise enough to remain silent - I on the other hand, would attempt to chime in on the great dinnertime debates, only to get corrected or instantly shot down.  The only opinion I have that doesn't get shot down is that Derek Jeter has a cute backside and a fine way of dodging inside pitches. Not that they agree with me, but none of them have any facts to support an argument against it - in fact, my family finds my Jeter fixation humorous. The guys' opinions often grossly differ, ultimately resulting in heated debates - the perfect time for me to lighten things up with comments about Jeter's assets.

I refused to become a sports widow so I made up my mind to embrace my family's love of sports - after all, if Matt can put up with and partake in antiquing with me, why couldn't I learn to partake in and enjoy sports?  The truth is, I love football season.  I really enjoy preparing a pot of chili or stew this time of year and there's nothing like leftovers after a manic Monday workday. To get in the 'zone', I purchased an Eli Manning Giants jersey and I wear it every Sunday.  I don't fully understand football, but I pay attention and ask questions.  I think my husband enjoys my interest and an opportunity to share his vast knowledge of the sport.

As Winter approaches, the days will grow shorter and colder here in the Northeast.  I can't wait to start a fire in our fireplace and smell chili simmering on the stove while I cozy-up on the sofa with my honey.  I don't mind watching the Tight Ends in a huddle either!

Tammy's Beef Chili
Ingredients:
1 1/2 lbs lean ground beef
3  tbsps olive oil
1 small yellow onion - diced
5 cloves of garlic - minced
1 cup fat free chicken broth
1 cup of raw carrots - diced
1 medium green pepper - diced
1  29 ounce can of tomato sauce
1  6 oz can of tomato paste
1  15.5 ounce can of small red kidney beans - drained and rinsed
10 dashes of chipotle hot sauce (or to taste)
1 packet (1.25 ounce) of McCormick's low sodium chili seasoning

Garnish with 2 % shredded cheddar cheese and serve with tostada chips

Brown ground beef in a frying pain, drain and rinse off excess fat.  In a large sauce pan, heat olive oil on medium heat, saute onions until translucent.  Add garlic, carrots and green pepper and saute for 3 minutes.  Add chicken broth and bring to a boil. 
Add cooked, strained ground beef and all other ingredients.  Bring to near boil on medium high heat, stirring frequently. Reduce heat to low and simmer, uncovered for 40 minutes stirring occasionally

Serve chili in small crocks, sprinkle with shredded cheddar.  Enjoy with tostada chips and someone you love!

......And They Lived Happily Ever After - My Perspective on Fairy Tales

Happily ever after - most little girls dream about a fairy tale wedding.  We dream of finding our prince, falling in love, marrying said prince and living happily ever after. As little girls do, we envision beautiful gowns, tiaras, a handsome prince and a lovely castle. I've been married twice and  as a 50 year old woman - I now know the truth about fairy tales.  It took a failed first marriage, 18 years together and nearly 15 years of marriage to Matt for me realize that I AM and we ARE living the fairy tale. We have shared many moments of joy and many moments of stress and pain. Together, we have formed a love and bond that will last a lifetime.
We renewed our vows this past May.  Allow me to share with you what I vowed to my prince during our vow renewal ceremony.

It seems like just yesterday that we stood before a judge with our small children by our sides…in front of our family and friends. I remember how I felt that day.  I married my soul mate – my best friend, the love of my life.  Nothing felt more right. I had this image in my mind of my true love. It was not a physical image but rather a feeling and a longing to be a part of something magical.  I wanted the fairy tale.

But what are fairy tales? They are not filled with only roses, love and happiness.  Fairy tales are stories that evolve.  There are obstacles: personal struggles, poverty, social rejection, villains and monsters to face and overcome.  Once these obstacles are overcome, personal growth must happen before the ‘happily ever after’ moment arrives.  That being said, anything worthwhile is worth the fight.  Without the bad times how could we possibly recognize and cherish the good times?  Over 14 years ago we vowed to love each other, cherish each other and remain true to each other, for better or for worse.  For all of the joys we have experienced thus far, we have also faced and weathered many storms together.  Together - we are amazing.  With you - is where I long to be.  I don’t need a romantic backdrop or an exotic location.  I enjoy you no matter where we are. I love us. I love that we can just touch hands and gaze into each other’s eyes and feel – connect, communicate without any spoken words.  I love that we can never say ‘I love you’ too often.

I promise to never forget the struggles we endured to be together.  I will always fight for us.  We are worth the fight.

I promise to never forget the good - all of the good you have shown me and our family in the past and the sacrifices you have made for us. I look forward to our future and the good memories that are yet to come.

I promise to weather every storm with you… because together we can overcome any obstacle. I will support you when life becomes overwhelming.

I promise to cherish you and our marriage.  I will never take you or our marriage for granted.  The love we share is so rare and precious to me.

I promise to be your best friend. I will listen even if I cannot help or understand. I will be your support when life leaves you weary and your shoulders feel overburdened.

I promise to laugh with you - at the funny things and the not-so-funny things - the way you cope with difficult situations has been through laughter. I am learning to cope with laughter because of you. 

I promise to hold you and love you and be there for you… you never need to search for someone who understands or could love you more than I – that simply is not possible – No one could love you more than I. I never knew I could love someone so much.  There are no words that do justice to how I feel about you and about US.

I promise to have your back. We are together and you are my husband. 

I promise to respect you and your decisions - even if I don’t always agree with you.

With promises there are expectations. I expect honesty and loyalty. Sometimes the truth hurts but together we are strong enough to overcome the hurt. I only expect what I am willing to give of myself. I promise to be honest and loyal – always.

I have entrusted you with my love, my life and my heart.  Please do not break my heart.

I expect you to come to me with anything - whether you think I can handle it or not.  Please don’t assume you know how I will react or how I will feel.

I expect you to refill my coffee if I need you to do so.

I expect you to love me while remaining true to you.  Do not change a thing - I love you as you are.

All I want is to love you for the rest of my life. To wake up every morning with you by my side.  Knowing that no matter what happens during our times apart, I’ll be able to come home to your loving arms.

All I want is to share everything with you - our ideas, dreams and hopes - for today and  for our future.

All I want is to give you my love .

All I want is to grow old with you - to travel one day at a time with you in our journey that is our marriage.

You are my present and my future. I only want to spend my life loving you until death us do part.

I believe in us.

The vows and promises spoken after many years of loving and living a fairy tale are not only powerful - they are much more meaningful because they come from love's wisdom and love's experience.  If you haven't considered renewing your vows, I highly recommend it.  There wasn't a dry eye in the room when we professed our vows to each other - because our words came directly from the heart of our fairy tale - laced with the joy, love, memories and struggles that we share together..... and they lived happily ever after.

Housework: United We Stand - Together Gets it Done Quicker

Housework - the word alone makes me cringe. Maintaining a home is work and it's a thankless job that's never really completed.  Just when the overflowing hamper is finally emptied,  dirty laundry is getting tossed  in. Is it me, or does it seem as if the dirty clothes mate and multiply in that hamper?   Maybe that's why we "separate" the laundry. With 3 kids, 2 cats and a dog our house doesn't stay clean for very long.  Our cats have impeccable timing - they wait for the floors to be clean before feeling the need to cough up a hairball.   We vacuum up enough pet hair in a week to start our own business making kitty wigs for hairless cats.  We don't have dust bunnies - they're more like dust tumble weeds.
Carol Brady had it made.  The Brady's were a middle class family with a stay-at-home mom AND a full time, live-in maid. Seriously?  That's about as realistic as me giving up shoe shopping.  Did we grow up watching that nonsense? I need an Alice! We all need an Alice! With 6 kids, Mr. and Mrs. Brady and pets, Alice needed an Alice! It appeared that all Carol did was sew on a few buttons and help out in the kitchen.  With 3 kids in college we cannot justify hiring someone to clean house once a week - especially since it only stays clean for 15 minutes.  We'd rather do the job ourselves and save that money for dinner out or a weekend away.
Weekends are short.  So, our time off is precious to both of us. When it's time to clean, Matt and I divide and conquer. He's better at doing the floors than I am.  The nurse in me needs to hose down the kitchen and bathrooms killing any possible virus or bacteria that may be lurking around. We take turns cooking and cleaning up after meals.   If we divide and conquer, neither of us feels the work load is unfair and we get it done in half the time, thus leaving us with more play time.  When the kids were little we asked that they help out making them aware that with their help, the work gets done faster - ultimately getting them to the soccer field sooner. They grew up in a home that lacked sexist roles. Now that they are older, they do their own laundry, they are capable of cooking and keeping their own space clean.  Teens and clean - a bit of an anomaly, wouldn't you say?
Since Matt and I share the cooking responsibilities, it only makes sense that we grocery shop together.  We both have a say on what goes in the cart and ends up on our table.  We actually have fun shopping together. We enjoy each other's company, so for us, shopping is another opportunity to spend time together.  We spend too much time apart during the work week, so we choose to spend as much time together as possible on the weekends.  I am lucky enough to be married to my best friend. 
I imagine some may find our marriage nauseating, but it works for us.  Share and share alike - even when it applies to the drudgery of chores and errands that cannot be neglected.  Our marriage and home is happier when we work and play together - whether it's coping with a family crisis, sweeping up tumble weeds or cheering on our children at their games.  For better or for worse....I thank God we're in it together!